Saggy Pants and Wise Cracks

Several news services ran a story recently about various cities across America which want to pass legislature banning saggy pants.  You know — like the kind your teenage son is wearing right now.  This ridiculous waste of government employees’  time and taxpayers’ money runs completely contrary to living in “the land of the free.”  If they’re worried about exposure of body parts, then there are already laws in place for that.  I haven’t heard of a western country having laws regarding the types of clothing people are allowed to wear since the middle ages.  Let’s not go back there.

If someone wants to dress like a dork, that’s their right.  Certainly, many of those same bureaucrats don’t need to be told that, as they could do with a few fashion makeover tips themselves.  I’ve seen how a lot of our politicians dress (I won’t even go into the hairstyles), and I wouldn’t be throwing any stones if I were them.

But that’s not why I decided to blog about this story.  I decided to blog about this story because of Matthew Verrinder.  Matthew Verrinder is the reporter who wrote the story, and he seems to be one of those people who truly appreciates his own sense of humor.  I appreciate it, too:

“Proposals to ban saggy pants are starting to RIDE UP in several places. At the EXTREME END, wearing pants low enough to show boxers or bare buttocks in one small Louisiana town means six months in jail and a $500 fine. A CRACKDOWN also is being pushed in Atlanta. And in Trenton, GETTING CAUGHT WITH YOUR PANTS DOWN may soon result in not only a fine, but a city worker assessing where your life is headed.”

I have to wonder if “assessing” was also a carefully chosen word.

I have to end this post by saying congratulations to Matthew — your story kicks butt.  I hope it helps to boost any sagging sales your company may have been experiencing and gets you some exposure.  Oh and P.S. — I apologize for dropping all these wisecrack cliches on you and making you the butt of my joke. 😉

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