Beer Haiku

Beer Haiku Daily is just that – a site featuring a haiku each day having to do with beer and its effects.  For example, here is the entry from last Monday:

That joke from last night
Is even less funny now
Than when you told it.

Great concept; amusing site.  Go check it out now.

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6 Cute and/or Funny Haiku Books You Want to Buy

work is a circus
I trapeze without a net
surrounded by clowns

               –Edie Montgomery-Pool

I love haiku, especially when it has a funny or quirky angle.  If you’re feeling the love for haiku, too, here is a list of books that might interest you.  (These would also make great gifts for that person you know well enough to feel obligated to buy a present, but don’t know quite well enough to figure out what the heck they’d want.)

Goodbye Jay, Hello Conan

As you probably know by now, Jay Leno is leaving The Tonight Show, and Conan will be taking over as host.  I love Conan, so this makes me very happy.  Jay Leno fans also have something to be happy about–now they won’t have to stay up so late to see him as he’ll be starting a new talk show, set to air weekdays at 10pm.

In honor of this momentous historical occasion (hee hee), I’ve written some commemorative poetry…

Goodbye Jay, Hello Conan (The Tonight Show)
by Edie Montgomery-Pool
 

Goodbye, Jay
I never watched you anyway
Your jokes aren’t really my style
They rarely made me crack a smile
 

Conan – hi!
You’re a funny funny guy
The moment I heard you’d be the new star
I programmed you into my DVR

And for those of you who like funny haikus (and who doesn’t love a funny haiku)…

Jay Leno Leaves The Tonight Show
by Edie Montgomery-Pool

 

So long, Jay Leno
Your giant chin will fill my
TV screen no more

_______________

(You may reproduce this poem in part or whole, on or in a website, email, podcast, or broadcast; permission for electronic reproduction is granted on the provision that the website on which the poem is published is not a vanity publisher or a scam poetry contest which requires its “winners” to make a purchase or pay a fee before being published. You may also reproduce this poem in print material for which net profits do not exceed $1,000. Author name must be included in any reproductions, and author must be notified whenever this poem is, or parts of this poem are, used. For all other uses not mentioned here, just ask and I will most likely say yes.) 🙂

The Poetry of Spam: Haikus About Lunch Meat

Spam, our favorite mystery meat.  I keep a can of it in the pantry at all times for when I get the occasional spam craving.  But as soon as I’ve swallowed the last bite, I get this gross feeling, like “why did I do that?

Keola Beamer also has a fascination with spam, but his is of the literary kind.  Keola collects spam haiku.  Here are a couple of samples:

Grotesque pinkish mass
In a blue can on a shelf
Quivering alone

Pink tender morsel
Glistening with salty gel
What the hell is it?

You can find tons more spam haiku at keola’s site.  (Unfortunately, no authors are credited.)

Kealo Beamer is a Hawaiian musician who specializes in the slack key guitar.  Visit Keola Beamer’s homepage for more info or to buy a CD.

Zombie Haiku

If you think zombies can’t write poetry, think again.  In his book, Zombie Haiku, Ryan Mecum gives us insight into the inner workings and deepest feelings of the zombie mind.  Here are a couple of examples of what you can expect to find in Zombie Haiku:

blood is really warm
it’s like drinking hot chocolate
but with more screaming

Looking at my hand
Somehow I lost a finger
And gained some maggots

From here you can visit the Zombie Haiku homepage, read the Zombie Haiku blog (including author touring information — if you’re brave enough to go see him), or buy the book, Zombie Haiku, at amazon.com.