The Poetry of Spam: Haikus About Lunch Meat

Spam, our favorite mystery meat.  I keep a can of it in the pantry at all times for when I get the occasional spam craving.  But as soon as I’ve swallowed the last bite, I get this gross feeling, like “why did I do that?

Keola Beamer also has a fascination with spam, but his is of the literary kind.  Keola collects spam haiku.  Here are a couple of samples:

Grotesque pinkish mass
In a blue can on a shelf
Quivering alone

Pink tender morsel
Glistening with salty gel
What the hell is it?

You can find tons more spam haiku at keola’s site.  (Unfortunately, no authors are credited.)

Kealo Beamer is a Hawaiian musician who specializes in the slack key guitar.  Visit Keola Beamer’s homepage for more info or to buy a CD.

Can You Haiku? (Contest)

Write a winter or holiday themed haiku and win a $5 gift certificate to giveanything.com, spendable at over 300 online stores, including Linens N Things, CD Universe, and Online Books Direct.  (For a full list of participating stores, view the categories on the left side of this page.)

Haikus are fairly easy to write, even for non-writers, so give it a whirl — you might just surprise yourself.  Also, I’ve noticed that compared to the amount of visitors this site gets, the amount of comments is fairly low — even for my easiest contest ever where all you had to do was leave a comment to win a prize.  What does that mean for you?  It means that just by entering, you have a good shot at winning.

A haiku is a 3-line poem with a syllable count of 5/7/5 (so 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second line, and 5 in the third line).  No rhyming necessary.  Here is an example:

A winter haiku
Spend five minutes writing it
And make five dollars

There is no limit on how many haikus you can enter.  Leave your haiku(s) as a comment to this post.  Your gift certificate will be sent to the email you enter when you leave your comment, but your email address will only be veiwable by me.  Also, I will not send you junkmail or sell your email address to anyone.

I’ll feature the winning haiku in its own post, so don’t forget to include the author name you want to go with it.  The deadline is December 20th.  Have fun!